Are you the one?


I think the idea of finding THE ONE is over-hyped. If you ask me, I’d say there is no such thing as ‘the right one’. There is instead, more of a thing as ‘the one at the right time’. When E got married, I shared my honest thoughts with her. I said, any man could be the one, if the timing is right.

What hurts the most, is finding the one at the wrong time. And to that, I admire those who able to harden their hearts and move on, rather than continuing something which will eventually lead to nothing. I literally felt my heart twinge when my Spanish ex-colleague told me her story. While working with us in Wales, she met her boyfriend. A Welshman very much Welsh at heart. She lived in Wales with him for two years but the dreary weather, the incessant gloomy days, perpetual grey skies, relentless wintry showers and rainy summers got to her. And even though he was the one, she made the choice to move back to Spain. Because he wouldn’t want to leave Wales and she couldn’t bear another dreadful winter away from family. I admired her courage and decisiveness. Because doing the right thing always hurts so bad and she actually had the guts to do it. She said, “I want to have children and how long am I going to wait for him?”

And what is my point exactly? We have construed in our minds fantasies and expectations of ‘the one’. These do not lead us closer to finding ‘the one’. If anything, they create dissatisfaction and take you further away from finding happiness. We will find ‘the one’ when we have no intention to look for ‘the one’. Love makes the sparks but respect makes it last.

There. That’s some weekend zen for thought.

Explore posts in the same categories: Drama, Life, Relationship

2 Comments on “Are you the one?”

  1. Annabel Says:

    I believe in The One. Always have, always will, but I don’t think it works for everyone.

  2. fefe Says:

    Nice food for thoughts 😉 It’s so difficult but I still believe in meeting the one… hopelessly hoping for that :p

    I guess just the idea of meeting the one is rather vague as it embeds many layers of other definitions before meeting one.

    Sorting out what I want, what I expect, what I would like, what is possible to have, what is ideal, what is not in ‘disneyland’ etc..but I know one thing…when I am so willing to give up everything for him…to put aside my priorities, to have children, etc and all these done willingly without bearing regrets or feeling disgruntled…

    I guess at that time, I would be able to say, yes I met The One…


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