He used the F word



Just hours before R snapped this series of shots at a fence outside the country hotel, we had a terrible row. Well, he said the worst thing a man could ever say to a woman. “You have put on a lot of weight.”

All because I had been munching on a couple of crisps before tea time. Nowhere near an indecent horrifying act in my opinion. But well the world is interesting because we don’t all agree on the same things, and so when we do disagree, all hell breaks loose.

Perhaps he had a sudden terrible vision of Ms Piggy lying beside him enjoying Pringles and then turning over to give him a greasy kiss while squashing his ribs. So at that moment he freaked out and snapped. “I don’t want to marry someone big and fat.”

The waterworks began, counter-attacks, huffs and puffs, more vengeful comments. And then I sobbed quietly into my tissue at the edge of the bed, and R sat slouched in an armchair waiting to provide me with new tissues.

“Sorry I was so mean, but I want you to feel more energetic. I know you’ve got this condition (thyroid, not bingeing), but I want you to get out more and do some exercise so you feel less lethargic. If you continue to put on weight you’ll feel even more tired all the time. I am sorry.”  

“Now wipe your tears cos we’re going down for tea.” (What?! Thanks! Want me to have tea after calling me a pig! Got the cheek.)  

If you’ve been appalled by his behaviour and you have a burning urge to send the ninjas to finish him off, don’t bother. Some other POSB (pissed-off supreme being) has done the work for you.

The last I heard, he ruptured his Achilles tendon while playing football with his mates (told him he was too old for that!) and will be relying on the crutches for a considerable amount of time.

Which means he will be in a cast when if he visits next month. “Marvellous, eh, R?”

Explore posts in the same categories: Health, Life, Relationship

One Comment on “He used the F word”

  1. fefe Says:

    sweet!….what a lovely couple 🙂

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