Eat it if you love it



Q: What is the difference between a dude who thinks about sex all the time but doesn’t discuss it, and a dude who thinks about sex all the time and makes sure the whole world knows he’s horny?

A: One is what women define as “a man”. The other is a pathetic, desperate male whom I hope will never be able to get laid in his entire life.

I never quite understood why boys have to talk about sex all the time. In the toilet. With friends. At home. In public. In the classroom. Over SMSes. It makes me lose all respect for them once they do that. All they care about is dicks and pussies.  

And it seems that at their age, they can turn any topic into a lewd discussion. Don’t believe? Here are some examples:

At a customer service class

Me: When we are on the phone with the customer, we must make sure we don’t have anything in our mouths. Don’t snack on crisps, bite your pen…

Student: Lick a dick… Ahahhahahha…

At a self-awareness class

Me: Fill in the blanks on page 2 and 3, see how well you know yourself.

Answers in student’s workbook: I am worried about [impotency]. I am most satisfied when I [get to squirt]. My greatest fear is cannot stand [being gay]. Being alone means [virgin].

In the assignment

“Banquet is a nice shop. It is nice. I like the food there. I like the drinks. I like the prata. Most importantly, there are a lot of pretty girls there eating. They look sexy. That’s a real nice place. You can eat and see girls. All your saliva drip on the table.”

OK, it’s really cool to brag to your friends what XXX videos you’ve watched online, how many times you can wank in a day, how super hard you can get, but come on, I just want to vomit everytime our discussion turns pornographic.

Can’t they exercise some censorship? Don’t they know it’s insulting to me and the other classmates? No wonder they are all single. Who would want to hang out with such lewd perverts? I hope they die alone as sad virgins.

And the next time I hear lan pa again, I’m going to make them eat their own.

Explore posts in the same categories: School

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