I watched the Fight Club on DVD just before my evil twin took over. Did Fight Club bring out my evil twin? The rude, negative and angry bitch? She had control over me for some days, because well, the nice girl took a break.
The grim one got to work and did what she was best at – being a bitch! Offending others, inflicting pain, distributing unhappiness, being anti-social, because that was her way of getting back at life. She felt let down. She felt that life was unfair to her. She felt the whole world owed her.
She was disappointed, disgusted and so damn freaking sick of her nice twin. She got mad thinking about the phrase, “good things happen to good people”, because what the hell, it did nothing for her twin! And so, why the heck should she be nice? It was easier to be nasty. To be the rock bottom. To be scum.
Tyler Durden in Fight Club subscribes to the theory that you cannot begin to live until you have hit rock bottom. This made the nice girl think. Hey, why not just allow herself to hit rock bottom? Screw positivity, enthusiasm, all that never-say-die crap. Since she didn’t get nothing out of being nice, hey surely she wouldn’t get punished for being mean?
Rock bottom says that you have hit the worst possible place in the human psyche. The only place you can go is up. Rock bottom says you are the all singing, all dancing crap of the universe. You are not a special and a unique butterfly. You are the same decaying matter as everyone else. We are all part of the same compost pile.
And so she dived to the bottom. The deep abyss of pain. Supposedly to conceal her hurt and to seek solace. To start all over again. To feel better? She was in the pits but she felt alive! She stood up to people. She wanted to be difficult.
And then, just like Edward Norton watching the buildings he bombed slowly collapse before his eyes, the evil girl vanished within moments and left the nice one to clean up the shit.
